Ashes to Ashes

Originally Posted 04/17/2009


So, I need to get some thoughts out before I can even think about sleeping.
There are some amazing human beings out there. And some others that just suck!

My parents house burned down today. A neighbor did something that started the surrounding woods on fire. Burned 70 acres of land. And my parents house. To the ground.
The house that we built is gone. I mean, my family cleared the land, dug the basement, built everything. The only thing we didn't do in that house was hang the drywall (and we only didn't do that because my parents didn't have time because they had to take my brother to a children's hospital in Detroit for major surgery). And now it's a big pile of ashes, along with everything that was in it. The only thing left of the house is two feet of a wall in the garage. I think I'm still in shock.

But there's this thing I have to say, have to get out of me. A couple of people brought money, food, blankets, shoes. Because everything is gone. Everything except what my parents wore to work. And at least one of the people barely knew us. And that's great, it makes me happy that there are people like them in the world. But then there were the others. 

My parents live in a secluded area past a small city of the outskirts of the suburbs of one of Michigan's larger cities. They live in the boonies, but within 30-45 minutes of a major city. So it was covered by the news from the major city. A lot. And all night long people came to gawk at my parents' pile of ashes. Car after car looked up how to get there (because when I say secluded I mean a private drive in the middle of BFE) and drove there after the 8-9 fire departments/100 firefighters that responded (no, I'm not exaggerating, they called in EVERYONE because they were afraid it would spread to the other hundreds of wooded acres surrounding it) had left. My parents had to park their car across the drive way to block it off so people would stop trying to pull up the drive to see it. So they just parked and walked up instead. People came and took pictures with their cell phones. One family brought their four young children to see. And then when they'd gotten their entertainment for the day they left without so much as a word to us. Just stared at my parents like some kind of animals in the zoo and like that pile of rubble and ashes was some weird habitat they came from. After I got there 3 teens parked, walked by the car blocking the way, went to take a look, and came down the driveway laughing as they walked by my sister and I. Who does that?! My family lost EVERYTHING, this was a tragedy for someone, not some god damn FUCKING CIRCUS!!! Who laughs at this? Who goes out of their way to drive by? I would say 30 or more cars did last night. And it just makes me so freakin angry.

I couldn't go up there until this evening, so I spent the afternoon refreshing my browser and looking at the news website as they posted more pictures of my home burning down. I don't live there now, but I did for many years. It was my home and it was gone and I watched from a news website. And that's heartbreaking and it feels weird. Someone recorded it burning down with their cellphone and broadcast it to the news website. Everyone could watch the hosue burn down with us. And for the people that watched it all as entertainment, I just have to say, fuck you. I'm sure you'll never read this, but I have to say it, because it burns in my chest and I just want it out so I can sleep and try to forget for awhile that it's all gone. At least I can breath easier knowing that my family is safe and still here, even if our stuff is not.